God Changes Lives

There always comes a time in this line of work where one asks, "Why am I here?" It's so much easier, comfortable, familiar at home. I speak the language. I know my way around. There are plenty of M-lims in various parts of the U.S. that need to hear the Story.

For my family that doesn't share the same kind of understanding of Christianity or Christ that I have, they think we are here because we are good people and want to do good things. Not just our family but a number of folks who hear our journey feel this way. I've been wrestling with this in the midst of asking the question, "Why am I here?" and I feel a strong conviction on the answer.

Let me tell you, I am not a good person. I don't like beggars on the street. They scare me. I judge other moms on the way they handle their kids. I think I am superior to people quite often. I also get lonely. I get sad. I worry a lot. I don't pray everyday. I want things my way and manipulate situations so that I get them.

When I first heard someone tell the story of Jesus, tell me what his death and resurrection meant for my life I was overjoyed. When I placed my life in His hands my life changed. Completely. I was lost and lonely and scared. When I met Jesus I received courage, faith, and love that was absent and unavailable from any other source. My life from that day on was always changing. I found strength in Christ to face hardship. I was able to love my enemies. And now I am able to live cross-culturally.

I have the ability to overcome my tendency to judge, manipulate, fear. It's not because I am good. It is because I belong to Christ who is good.

I'm therefore not here to do good. I really don't want to ever be here to do good. Do you know why I am here? I am here because God changes lives. I became addicted to the stories of changed lives at an early age. I heard of women in remote places of the world and their lives being changed by Christ. I became so excited about all these stories that I decided I wanted to make my life all about these stories. I want desperately to see God change lives. I know He can! I know He does! He changed mine! I've met M-lims that God changed through Christ. It wasn't a meal, or a coat. It wasn't picking up trash, although these may be part of the journey. No, it was encountering the Truth of Jesus Christ and the change is always amazing. No one can sufficiently describe it. There's nothing like it.

I am here in this particular place on this particular journey because I know God can use even me, a not-good person, to change a life. I want to put myself in position to be the courier of that news, that story of Jesus that transforms someone. Back home, I never had the pleasure of directly affecting a life in this way. But I'm not worried. It's not about me. It's God's design that I'm following.

Dear loved ones, I wish more than anything that you would let God change your life. It's not about being good. It's not what you do at all. It's all about receiving what you cannot find in yourself or anywhere else-love without boundaries, hope eternal, freedom from burdens. A Savior. A Healer. A Father. A Comforter. A Guide. A Friend. A Protector. I could go on and on.

This conviction has renewed the joy of my own salvation! Dear Lord thank you for changing my life! Thank you that after 16-17 years I can still find pleasure in knowing you, serving you, and telling your story. You love me so well. I love you too. Amen.